Some Extra Embarrassing Moments

Christmas was great! I'll write more about it later. I've been busy getting things together for the new year. Army and I are likely going to be making some big changes in our lives (nothing bad!), I'm attempting to return to meal planning once again, I've got a few prizes for y'all (oh, I don't know, something super-sonic, and something deen-a-licious among other things).

Friends and family enjoyed retelling some of my embarrassing moments over the holidays, so I'll leave you with a few tame ones for now. Generally, I weigh my words carefully in an effort to not hurt other people's feelings, but when I'm not worried about that, I tend to spew ridiculously embarrassing junk without thought. In high school, I was voted "Most Likely to be an Astronaut" because of my space cadet tendencies. When you combine those two personality flaws, you get lots of embarrassing moments!


The first two I'm responsible for:

Where I used to live, there is a deli with a drive thru. I drove up and placed my order (which was what I always got, so I didn't look at the menu), then drove up to the window to get my order. This particular place put a paper copy of the menu in the pick up window, so I glanced at it after I paid but while I was still waiting for my food and change. I noticed they had 8" subs. When the guy came back to give me my food, like a total moron, I said, "Wow! You've got an 8 inch? Most people only have 6 inches!" Everyone within earshot erupted in laughter, and I had no clue what I said wrong.

I went to a doctor's office. I knew he was Jewish (Army is friends with him, that's how I knew). As he's leaving the room, he said, "Peace be with you." I'm Catholic, and at mass we respond to that with "and also with you." Since he is Jewish, I had no idea what to say, so I just kind of smiled and let out a nervous giggle. A minute later his nurse came in and said, "Hi, I'm Denise." He had said "Denise'll be with you" but he had slurred it, so it sounded like Peace be with you. Thank God I didn't say, "and also with you!"

And one courtesy of my aunt:
After my sister's wedding and reception we went out to get a bite for dinner. We were discussing what time it was where my sister was honeymooning. My aunt pipes up with, "Well, it's an 8 hour flight, so they must be 8 hours behind us. It's probably about noon there right now."

Care For an Extra Meal Tonight?

For years, y.e.a.r.s, I've made fun of my sister's dog's habit of dining on Christmas ornaments. Hallie (the dog, not my sister) has eaten them all her life. They don't even call their vet anymore when she does it. It's that bad. I've made fun of the fortune my sister's family spends on ornaments that just end up satisfying her dog's sweet? glass? not-sure-what-to-call-it-tooth. One year my sister put candy canes on the tree. Seriously? Why do that when you know your dog craves tree decorations? Sugar won't cure that ill!

I've never understood why they didn't put an end to it though. My sis has a degree in chemical engineering, she's got to have some sense. The dog keeps up her habit though. None of the dogs I've ever had would do such things. Ever.

Now I have to eat my words (but not ornaments!). Tonight Army and I were talking, and I noticed our dog doing the GI crawl. We have a golden retriever, and she has an ample hiney, so it's not like she was really sneaking up on anything. She noticed me looking at her, so she stopped moving and eyed her ball-ball. Army and I went back to talking, and the dog starts the GI crawl again. I looked at her again and tried to figure out what she was doing. Army called her name, and she froze in place. We looked around, but couldn't find anything that she might be 'hunting' like a duck that belongs to Linus or a napkin, etc. We started talking again, and she resumed her GI crawl. The further she got, the higher her ample bum got. At this point, Army and I were rather intrigued. We simply could not figure out what she was after. As we'd stop talking, she'd notice she had an audience, so she'd stop moving. We'd talk again, and she'd crawl again. We finally decided she was just being a silly dog and kept talking. Then it happened. BAM! She lurched for the tree. Have you ever seen a 70 something pound dog sneak up on then attack a tree? Not pretty! The poor tree put up a good fight. So did the ornaments.

Me? I'll be eating crow tomorrow. I have no doubt my sister will somehow find out, and she'll give me back all the harassing I've given her for the past seven years.

Aging Extra Quickly

My cousin sent Linus some clothes today. Linus was having a ball digging through the box when she came upon a Nemo nightgown (which she calls a nightdown). She immediately pulled it out and held it up to her. As she began dancing around with it, we had the following conversation:

Linus: A Nemo nightdown! I have wanted this my whole life!
Me: Exactly how old are you?
Linus: Four. It might not be that long to you, but to me it's For.Ev.Er!

Seriously, where does she come up with this stuff?

****************
How could I forget my favorite Christmas (wrong) lyrics?
It's no secret that Linus really wants a baby brother or sister, so maybe that is where this one comes from:
Oh, bring us some baby pudding (Oh, bring us some figgy pudding from We Wish You a Merry Christmas). :)

An Extra Happy Day!

Nine years ago today, Army and I were married. My wedding, reception, and marriage have been everything I could ask for and more. Since we got married at Christmastime, everything was decorated beautifully. It was an amazing sight to see. Let me take you on a little trip down memory lane.


*Edited: Ignore the links in this paragraph. They don't work...I'm leaving them until I am able to replace them with pictures though.
After our rehearsal at the church, his parents gave us a fabulous dinner here in one of the banquet rooms. It was a delicious dinner, and we really had a lot of fun. Our dessert was their famous mile high pie, and Army and I have had a slice the night before our anniversary all but one year since we've been married. It is so big and so yummy! We absolutely have to split it, and I still have leftovers from my half that Army dutifully eats.

The next afternoon, we were married here. Although it can come across as a bit ornate, the pictures from weddings here are breathtaking. The church is along St. Charles Avenue, and when we exited the church, a streetcar was going by. All the tourists were hanging out the windows taking pictures of us. It was surreal!

We left by limo (this is big for me, and one day I'll explain why, for now I'll just leave you with the knowledge that I was nearly killed--accident, not murder-- in one a few years before my wedding). We enjoyed our reception here (click 'home' to see some additional pics of the outside, which is absolutely dreamy!). I was so busy having fun at our reception that I forgot to eat. No worries, they sent a tray up to our room that night, and Army had made reservations at a delicious restaurant. My sister and multiple cousins had their receptions here too. I was first and got a great room with a private balcony on St. Charles Avenue. None of the others who stayed there could stay in our room. The poor reception coordinator had to figure out different rooms for everyone because nobody could stomach staying anywhere that a relative had spent their first married night. Hehe! I think I got the best room, but I'm pretty certain all the others feel they got the best.

Army surprised me with reservations for dinner here after our reception ended. YUM! I've been there many times for various functions, and I have never been disappointed. It's that good! Unfortunately, it's well known for heavy cream sauces and such, which I did indulge in after I no longer needed to fit in my wedding dress. Lucky me, it induced my first gallbladder attack. Yeah, Army could have kicked himself for those reservations later that night! ;) I was fine though.

The next morning, we headed to the airport for our honeymoon. The weather for my wedding was in the 70s, and our honeymoon was rather warm too. When we left to return home, we were shocked at the packed airport. Most of the US was hit by a hard ice storm, so we had to literally step over people at the airport to make our flight. When we arrived back in New Orleans, it was freezing! Thankfully, my father is superman and thought ahead. He greeted us with nice warm coats!

I can honestly say, despite the difficult emotional situations we've faced (fertility issues, miscarriages, serious illness, my father's brain injury, etc) that we've had a wonderful nine years. I can't wait until I'm able to say the same about fifty years! :)

Extra (oops!) Song Lyrics

**Edited to fix my embarrassing mistake!

Linus loves to sing. She loves all things music. On occasion she misunderstands lyrics. Christmas songs tend to give her the most trouble. Here's a sampling of the songs we hear at our house:

Oh Well, Oh Well (Noel, Noel from The First Noel)

Glory had a nooner...(Glory Hallelujah to the newborn king from Glory Hallelujah)

Dawn was a fairy gaggle...(Don we now our gay apparel from Deck the Halls)

Hey, I'll take all of these over what she called Frosty when she was one and a half years old: Farty the Snowman. We don't even use the word fart in our house, so it was total coincidence!

Some Extra Info

I've been tagged by LeeAnn. I really need to add her to my links. She posts great weekly menus with recipes, she's hilarious, and I like her parenting style. She's got adorable kiddos too. :)

Here's how this one works:
Ok, this is specifically not a meme. It's a HOOPLA. Got it?
Here are the rules:
1. List 12 random things about yourself that have to do with Christmas
2. Please refer to it as a 'hoopla' and not the dreaded 'm'-word
3. You have to specifically tag people when you're done. None of this "if you're reading this, consider yourself tagged" stuff is allowed...then nobody ends up actually doing it. The number of people who you tag is really up to you -- but the more, the merrier to get this 'hoopla' circulating through the blogosphere.
4. Please try and do it as quickly as possible. The Christmas season will be over before we know it and I'd like to get as many people involved as possible.

Here goes:

1) I have an absolute obsession with looking at Christmas lights. I grew up with beautifully decorated homes along St. Charles Avenue, *slightly* overdone (ha!) Al Copeland's various spots, and this amazing house in Metairie (I think) from when I was little. At the amazing house, they had great displays that totally grabbed children's attention, but they also had a talking Frosty! He was interactive waaayyyy before interactive was the thing. He'd call you by name when talking to you, and you could touch his icy body. Yikes! It wasn't as bad as that makes it sound.

2) Santa brings Linus Christmas pjs each year. He brings them a size up so that she can get a lot of wear out of them. He leaves instructions for her to wear them to bed Christmas Eve the following year so that he'll know he's at the correct house. This allows her to wear Christmas pjs to bed Christmas Eve and a new pair Christmas night.

3) I'm the oddball who doesn't take Christmas decorations down until January 6th. I'm all about waiting 'til the Epiphany.

4) I always look forward to January 6th because it's King's Day which means Mardi Gras King cakes begin to hit the stores. Yum!

5) I truly miss McKenzie's Christmas cookies. They did holiday cookies (Valentine's Mardi Gras, St. Patrick's day, Halloween, and Christmas) that were divine. Since they only did holidays you didn't get sick of them. This is the same bakery that made the yummiest petit fours.

6) Like LeeAnn, I keep Christmas card photos. I like to go back and see how people have grown. I LOVE getting Christmas cards.

7) I love Christmas Day, but I really love Christmas Eve. I think it's the anticipation that makes me so excited.

8) I am horrible about mailing my Christmas cards in a timely manner. Every year I promise myself that I'll get started earlier, but each year they go out on about the 20th. Nope, I still haven't done them this year. :(

9) I like eggnog. I wish I didn't. It would save me tons of calories.

10) My anniversary is during the week before Christmas. Everyone said I'd hate having it then, but I love it. I love that the city was decorated beautifully, the church was decorated beautifully, and my reception place was decorated for Christmas. Army and I really aren't into giving anniversary presents (and we're both perfectly ok with that), so it really doesn't cause present dilemma issues. The only issue that it causes is we sometimes take advantage of having a babysitter (so that we can go out to dinner) and use the time for shopping.

11) I love Christmas Eve service. We don't go to midnight mass, but we do go Christmas Eve. It always feel magical to me.

12) I love Christmas music. I love to hear Linus sing her heart out. We usually pop a Christmas cd in November 1st. Hey, at least we wait 'til after Halloween!

Ok, Kim, Katie, Lori, and Leia consider yourself tagged! I'm being nice to some of y'all and not tagging some of the people I know you'll tag. I hate when I'm tagged, but everyone I'd tag has already been tagged!

ETA: Adding a 13th just to see if I'm the only one who does this...
We don't put Baby Jesus in our Nativity until Christmas morning. Our reasoning is He wasn't born until then. When we put him in, we sing the Happy Birthday song to Baby Jesus.

Extra Loud, Extra Clear

Linus had her preschool Christmas program today. She, as usual, was front and center. I've always thought she was front and center because she is so tall. Not so the director told me. She said Linus is always in the middle because they know she'll perform. As the director said, "There's not a shy bone in that child."

She actually had lines in the program this time. Usually she's singing and dancing (and in years past, lifting her shirt to expose all her glory while her father and I cringe), but this year she even spoke. She spoke loud and clear. She had 31 words for her part. Yeah, I admit I'm the dork that counted, but I think that's a sizable amount for a four year old to memorize! If it's not, please don't burst my bubble. And she danced. The child danced her heart out as she sang Away in a Manger (I know, not so much of a dancing song, but Linus absolutely canNOT stand still if there's music being played in a five mile radius).

All of my pictures have other children in them, and I really don't think it's fair to post them on the internet without their parents' permission. I'll try to crop them out tomorrow so I can post them. For now, here's a pic with Santa who made a surprise visit after the breakfast.

An Extra Spelling Lesson

Linus had a few mishaps at preschool today, so when she asked to go look at Christmas lights we thought that might give a good ending to her day. When her daddy agreed, she took a shot and asked for ice cream too. Her day really was bad, so Army said she could have some ice cream. We stopped at an ice cream shop, but it was closing in 7 minutes, so we felt like it wouldn't be nice to drop in at that point. Poor Linus was a little bit upset, but Army promised to stop at the store and get a pint. After we looked at lights, we stopped by the grocery store to pick up the ice cream. Linus and I stayed in the car while army ran in. The grocery store is at the end of a large outdoor mall. It was nearing 9 o'clock (past L's bedtime!), so the stores were closing. Linus noticed the closings, and she remembered the closed ice cream shop, so she began asking why stores closed. After a short discussion, she commented that Bruno's (grocery) was still opened. We have two other large grocery chains within a few blocks of our home, so we rarely shop at Bruno's. I asked her how she knew we were at Bruno's, and she said, "Because I know."


Me: But how do you know?


Linus: It says so.


Me: What do you mean it says so?


Linus: (sigh) Right there, Mommy.


She was pointing to their sign:

Linus: It says Bruno's. J-3-r-u-n-o-s! Bruno's.

I'm thinking she might not be able to read a fancy B yet! :)

Poor child sells out way to easily too. She was perfectly happy with two spoons (spoons, not scoops!) of ice cream!

Uh-oh, Uh-oh, and an Extra Uh-oh!

I'm fear my daughter's teenage years. She's always had a great sense of humor, but tonight it became apparent that she's playing us. We, however, were way too slow to get it until it became obvious.

At dinner tonight, Linus ordered her own meal. She told the lady,
"I'd like a grilled cheese, please."
Lady: What side would you like with it?"
Linus: Cimmanon Apples

We finished placing our orders and I turned to Linus and said,
"What kind of apples did you order?"
Linus: Fruit ones
Me: But did you order plain ones or ones with a flavor
Linus: Fruit with an apple flavor
Me: Ok, exactly what kind of apple flavored fruit did you order?
L: Cimmanon
Me: (smiling) What?
L: Cimmanon
Me: I love that!

A few minutes later Army and I were talking about it again.

Me: Linus what did you order?
Linus: apples cimmanon
Me: What about the other way (meaning cimmanon apples instead of apples cimmanon)
Linus: Oh you mean cinnamon?

Little turkey knew how to say it correctly the whole time. There are very few things she mixes up anymore, and I kind of miss her words. At least she gave me a few minutes to enjoy it.

A little while later, Linus was drawing a picture on the back of her children's menu. I could see she was drawing an oval with a baby in it, and I realized it was baby Jesus in the manger. Then she went on to draw something slightly above and to the right of the manger. I couldn't tell what it was, but she quickly looked at me and said, "Mommy, does God wear earrings?"
Here's the thing: You can't just say "no" to Linus because without a doubt her next question would be, "How do you know? You've never seen God, have you?" I took the cheater's way out and said, "What do you think? Does He?"

An Extra Personality

Got this from my friend Leia. I was going to do a separate post for the recipe later this week, but since I'm stealing from her already, I though I'd just do it all together.

First:

You Are Rudolph

Sweet and shy, you tend to be happiest when you're making someone else happy. Why You're Naughty: You sometimes stick that nose where it doesn't belong Why You're Nice: Christmas would be a sad affair without you!

Which of Santa's Reindeer Are You?

Second:
Leia is partially responsible for keeping Army very happy once or twice a month. She passed this recipe along, and Army LOVES it. If I let if fall from the rotation occasionally, he lets me know. Linus loves it too. She absolutely loves chicken and pineapple, so it's a win-win for her. It's so easy it's almost embarrassing, but it keeps them happy.

Leia's Slow-Cooker Pineapple Chicken
2-3 lbs chicken breasts
1/2 c teriyaki sauce
1 sm onion cut into wedges (I leave this out--Army hates onions)
1 med can (14 oz) pineapple chunks in juice

Cook on low 6-7 hours
Serve over rice or noodles (Sometimes we eat it plain too)

Easy, huh? You'd think I could remember that recipe, but before I memorized it, I had to ask Leia for it a zillion times. She's a dear. She always gave it and never complained. She had to be thinking what an idiot I was though; I know I did! **I do have it written down now. Had it saved to my computer, but that file is lost in nowhere land now.

An Extra OUCH or Two

I've been MIA for a few days, but I have a good (or bad depending on how you look at it) excuse.

First of all, I have a killer ear infection. For crying out loud, I'm in my thirties! Shouldn't these have ended, oh say, 30 years ago?

To make matters worse, Linus has some fluid in her ears, so she's unbelievably loud. Our neighbors should be calling soon to ask us to quiet her down some. I suspected she had some fluid based upon how loud she's been, but I didn't know for sure. Army usually has to look in her ears for true confirmation (or we have to take her to the pediatrician). He simply does not understand why I can't grab his otoscope and look myself. I can look, it just means nothing to me. Nothing. I didn't even have to have him look this time. Linus had been in her room napping, and when she woke up she asked if she could come out. I told her that she could, but she never appeared. She asked again, again I said yes. Once again, she didn't come out. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that if your child doesn't come out of their room after you've told them they may that they are either up to something terribly naughty, or they simply can't hear you. I checked on her, and as suspected, she never heard me give her permission. Army checked her ears, and sure enough, I was right. Why did he spend all that money an a degree when I can diagnose just as well? ;)

Our other problem this week: our dishwasher broke. Army tried what he could, but nothing helped. We called a plumber, but he said we need a new motor. He suggested just getting a new dishwasher, but I think we may just go with a new motor. I just can't wrap my head around replacing a 3 year old appliance. We called a repair man to replace the motor, but he can't come for TWO weeks. Ok, so I know people washed dishes by hand in the past, and some still do, but I don't. Well, at least I don't like to. At all. These next two weeks are going to be a challenge.

Extra Prayer Request

If you have a moment, think about visiting Katie and sending up a prayer for her tomorrow (Tuesday). Thanks! :)

Extra BAD Mommy!

Big A (2.5) walked over to my sister a little upset. When my sis asked what was wrong, she just kept saying Linus's name over and over and mumbling a few other things that we just weren't sure about. Sis, Big A, and I went to Linus's room to find out what was going on. Turns out Linus tried to put Big A in time-out. Thankfully my sis and her husband found it hilarous and weren't the slightest bit upset. When I asked Linus why on earth she'd put Big A in time-out, she said they were playing. You'd think I'd learn to just let things be sometimes, but I apparently haven't. I asked Linus WHAT they were playing, she said, "We were playing Mommy!"
OOPS! I really didn't think I put Linus in time out that often. Maybe I'm wrong!

Extra Thankful

10 Things I'm Extra Thankful For (in no particular order):

1. Family--both immediate and extended, and the close relationships I have with them.

2. Linus's Birthfamily--I do consider them family, so they could have been a part of #1, but I'm thankful for them on so many different levels that I wanted them to have their own!

3. My Father's Life and all those responsible for saving him and maintaining his life--when he was discovered in May, he was clinically dead. Technically it happened two more times. We were so close to losing him, and I'm so thankful we didn't.

4. My IRL Friends

5. The friends I have met here (internet).

6. Health

7. The soldiers who protect our freedom

8. The roof over my head

9. Linus, Linus, Linus, yeah, I know I already said family, but I'm so very thankful for her

10. God!

Extra Wishes

Just a quick post to wish everyone Happy Thanksgiving! I've got an insane amount of guests coming (and staying!), but I'm very thankful to have them in my life! :)

Extra Curious

I've never been one to deal well with suspense. I go nuts at Christmas when I see a wrapped present and don't know what it is. I do a really good job at not peeking at my presents, mainly because I do want some surprise on Christmas, but I have to admit (blush) that I have gone as far as peeking at Linus's presents from relatives and friends. I just can't help myself.



Army pulled a really good one over on me when he asked me to marry him. How he kept that secret from me I'll never know. I had a really good feeling it was coming, but I didn't know for certain, and he really shocked me when he did it. I totally wasn't expecting it---to the extent that I changed plans and went out with friends that evening. Oops!



I also have a lot of trouble reading books. I LOVE to read, but the suspense drives me bonkers. I will literally get panicky trying to keep from reading the end of the book. The only thing that saves me is knowing it won't be any fun to read the book if I already know the ending.



My point is I really have a hard time with suspense. A really, really really hard time! I'm going absolutely nuts trying to figure out who some of you are. New York, New York--I've got some family there, but I don't think that's who you are. Actually, you are one person who checks from a few different places within the city, or there are a few of you out there. Really, in NY it's New York City and Buffalo (shout out to Buffalo--dated a great guy from there once) and a few other places I've never heard of, but now I'm super curious about them. North Carolina--same story, but this time I know you aren't my family because I've got people from ALL over NC checking in. I'm going bonkers not knowing who you are. GREAT people in my life come from NC! Washington (Seattle to be exact)--who are you??? Illinois, Georgia, Indiana, and Michigan---y'all are checking in from all over the state, and I can't figure it out. It's like a suspense novel and the ending has been ripped out. I'm going NUTS! Texas--I've got family there too, but I've got readers from all over TX too. Same for California--y'all are all over the state. Virginia, Minnesota, Iowa WHO are you??? Canada, oh Canada, who are all of you? I know there's more than one of you, and I secretly (or not so secretly anymore) LOVE that each of you usually read for a while each visit. Wisconsin, who are you? My sister spent time there training for Trane, but I know you're not my sister--she's not there anymore. Louisiana, again, tons of family there, but I *think* I know who most of you are. Florida, who are you? I was in your neck of the woods in September--loved it there! Alabama, I can't forget my own state. I know I'll never know who reads from my city, but there are a lot of you out there, and I don't think I know somebody from all the cities reading. AACCKKK! I'm going nuts!

I get readers from outside North America, but they usually aren't repeat readers. Hello, Italy, you are a repeat reader. Who are you? LOVE your food! :)

To be fair, I do know who some of my readers are: I know some of Maryland, but not all. I know some of Virginia, some of Minnesota, some of Georgia, some of Indiana, but I don't know who all of the people from those states checking in are.

I've got to stop before I do any other states. I'm working myself up to suspense overload! Seriously, I'm going crazy trying to imagine who you could be. Come on, friends, throw me a bone. Give me a hint. Please? Pretty please??? Please, please, please? I don't do well with suspense! I bet you couldn't tell that though! ;)

ETA: Who ever you are ::Afghanistan:: who hacked my blog and changed my profile, you can bite me. To all the others, I still love you! :)

Edited Again To Add: HA! I might be on to something! I enabled my email incase anybody didn't want to comment, but was willing to let me know who they are. I've already gotten two emails. WOOHOO! You people rock!

Extra Thanks!

Many thanks for the prayers and good thoughts for my friend. Her son is doing very well. He will have to have an additional surgery, but the doctors are feeling very positive. He looks great and his oxygen levels are great.

He's definitely a little fighter. That alone will take him far in life.

I cannot begin to express how happy I am. :)

Thanks again for your prayers!

Extra Sick and Tired

I am SO sick and tired of my family being sick! Remember this time? How 'bout this time? Maybe this time? Or possibly this time? And I didn't even write about the horrible colds Linus and Army had. Even the dog has been sick.

Well, I'm tired of it! Today Army called me and said he was coming home. Army never misses work, so I knew it was bad. He said he thought he got food poisoning from last night, but since we ate the exact same thing, I don't believe it! I think he has a stomach virus.

I'm fully aware of how mean and immature this will sound, but I have NINE people staying IN MY HOUSE next week! I'm seriously hoping Linus and I will be spared because I don't know what we will do if the virus is still running its course through our house then!

I think part of what is bothering me is we are usually very healthy! We usually do not catch everything that comes along. Ugh!

So to all the viruses lurking around at this time of year: GO AWAY AND STAY AWAY!!!!!

Extra Thanks!

Many, many thanks for the prayers. I still have not heard anything. I'm choosing to look at that as no news is good news. I won't call and disturb them. She'll (or her mom will) call when she's ready. At any rate, I'm very thankful for your prayers and good thoughts!
_______________

Some of you know that Linus had a medical procedure a few months ago. She has had a few seizures, so she had an MRI to rule out any brain structure abnormalities or tumors. She does not have clonic-tonic (formerly known as Grand Mal)---she does not convulse with her seizures. She does experience rapid eye movement on occasion though. When her physicians discuss the seizures with us and with her, they use the term "shake" on occasion.

Tuesday while we drove home from preschool, Linus and I were discussing how long it has been since she has had a big seizure. I asked her if we should celebrate that she hasn't had one in long time, and she said she wanted to. Then I asked her how we should celebrate. My child has the best outlook about all of this, and a fabulous sense of humor too. How did she want to celebrate? She said, "We should make blue bumpies (jello) so they can do the shaking!" :) My goodness, I love this child!

Extra Prayers

I've got another prayer/good thoughts request. My best friend growing up is having a baby tomorrow (Wednesday). At her 20 wk ultrasound, they discovered that he has a very serious heart condition (I believe he has only 2 chambers, but I could have that wrong). From what I understand, he will be taken to Children's immediately, and he'll have to endure multiple surgeries. She's having him by c-section, so she won't be able to go with him. I know this is killing her. She also has a little boy four weeks older than Linus. He and Linus love each other dearly. She has always taken the approach that he will live (at least with me), and I truly believe he will. I know the 'what if' thoughts slip in though. Y'all, she's one of the greatest people I know. She is an incredible friend and an incredible mom. I'm sitting here in tears, not because I don't think he'll make it---like I said, I truly believe he will---it's just one of those things, when someone you love hurts, you hurt too. I am quite thankful that the medical community is prepared for his arrival and has a plan of action in place. Anyway, I'd appreciate the prayers/good thoughts for her and the baby, and I know she'd appreciate them too.

Extra Grown

Linus has wanted to learn to whistle for quite a while. Today she truly whistled. As she heard the sound come from her lips, her eyes got wide and proud. As she began to jump with excitement, she said, "I DID IT! I really did it! Did ya hear that? I did it! Oh my goodness, I'm growing up now! I can whistle! I did it! I'm ready for high school now!" UM, NOOOOOOO!!! I'm upset enough about losing her for a full day of kindergarten, please don't push the high school issue at FOUR!!!

Extra Name Possibilities

Army and I knew there was no possible way we could pick Linus up on time after preschool Friday. I went ahead and asked the director if she could stay for aftercare. Linus loves aftercare because two of her friends stay late on Fridays, so I didn't feel too terribly bad about it.

One of the preschool teachers noticed Linus in aftercare and asked her where we were. "My mommy and Daddy are working on a new baby." Thankfully the teacher knew that wasn't the case and got a giggle out of it, but she did run with it a little bit. She had this conversation with Linus:

Teacher: They are working on a new baby?"

Linus: Yes, they sure are. I'm going to have a little sister for mommy and me, and I'm going to get a little brother for my daddy.

T: Really? What will your little sister's name be?

L: Caroline!

T: I thought your mommy likes the name Erin.

L: Nope, it's Caroline.

T: I really thought I heard your mommy say she likes the name Erin.

L: NO! CAROLINE! Her name will be Caroline!

T: But what if Mommy names her Erin?

L: That won't happen!

T: But what if it does?

L: IT WON'T HAPPEN! I can change her mind! It WILL be Caroline.

So, anybody think I have any choice/input on the name of a child? Oh, and anybody want to know what she'd name a little brother?

ROCKSTAR!!!

Thanks Linus, but no!

An Extra Conversation or Two

*****Warning! Foul Language***** (Kiddie conversation)

I'm at Linus's preschool a lot, and happily fill in where needed. I was asked to sub in one of the Mother's Day Out classes today, so I filled in for a little while. I absolutely fell in love with this class. Oh my goodness, those kiddos are so sweet and so adorable! They were 18-24 months old and just so much fun.

At one point, one of the cuties got my attention and said, "No f***ing!"

I looked at him with a very confused look on my face, and said, "Could you tell me again?" Again, he said, "No f***ing!"

Um, ok, hmmmm, let's see. I finally asked him if he could show me what he was talking about one word at a time. After those words came out my mouth, I started to wonder if I really wanted him to show me! Thankfully, he was able to show me. He turned over a truck and said, "No. F***. In"

Ahhh, the truck wasn't supposed to go in somewhere. Phew! Linus mispronounced some words, but truck was never one of them. I've heard of many children messing up that particular word, but I was totally unprepared for it today.

Let me preface this next one with this child's mother really is a good mother! One of the two year olds usually brings milk for lunch. His Mom's Morning Out teacher asked him if his milk was good. His response? "Well, actually I'm drinking a virgin screwdriver." Whoa, back up! What? He went on to say, "My virgin screwdriver is orange juice and pineapple juice." Yes, I heard it with my own two ears...and I laughed my hiney off!

Later in the day, Linus and I were on our way home from a little get together. I was praising her for her fabulous behavior today, and she admitted one little glitch.

Let me back up a little to give you an idea of where this came from. On Halloween, Linus and the other children at the preschool were allowed to dress in non-scary costumes. As you know, Linus dressed as Minnie Mouse. Gee, ya think that had anything to do with our recent trip? ;) Anyway, as we walked in to school that morning, the director and another teacher were setting up a pumpkin patch for the children. One of them said to the other, "Oh look! There's Minnie Mouse!" Linus, as completely serious as could be, shook her hand and said, "Oh no, it's me, Linus. This is just a Minnie Mouse costume. I'm just dressed up, but it's still Linus!" It was absolutely hysterical. Word got around about what she said, so many of the teachers (who I am friends with) asked her if she was Minnie Mouse. Well, Linus eventually decided she wanted to change her name to Minnie Mouse. Permanently. Today her teacher called her Linus, and she asked her teacher to call her Minnie Mouse. To understand the rest, you need to know that Linus's given name is a three syllable name. When she asked her teacher to call her Minnie Mouse, her teacher said that it was too long. When Linus related the story to me, she said, "Really Mommy! Min-nie Mouse. ___-___-___!" comparing the three syllables in each. Then she added, "They are the same length!" Thank goodness she didn't actually give her teacher a lesson in syllables!

Extra Gross

Wonder Dog? NOT so wonderful right now. She had the nerve to wake me up from my five minute nap. She wasn't barking, she was pumping her stomach. GROSS! Have I mentioned Army calls me a hurl-a-phobe because I absolutely cannot stand anything dealing with vomit? EWWW! She's fine now, so who knows what it was. Despite her bark the other night, she does not get any people food, so I don't think that's what it was. She doesn't go outside when we're not out, so I don't think she ate something bad outside. She's better now though, and that's what's important.

Linus learned our phone number today. She's tried learning it on and off over the past few months, but she just couldn't get it. Today I sang it to her to the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and she learned it immediately. She also learned to spell our last name. :) Now she wants to learn to tie her shoes. Oh and guess what? She has a speaking part in her preschool Christmas play!

Extra Strange

Two things happened tonight that were rather strange.

The first has me a little worried. Linus asked to go to bed tonight. She didn't want to go through most of our bedtime routine---she just wanted to get in bed! Since she wasn't interested in eating dinner tonight, I'm a little worried she's getting sick. I sure hope not! I hope it's just the time change catching up with her.

The second one involves our wonderdog. She barked! Now I know that's not unusual for most dogs, but our dog is a year and a half old, and I can literally count the number of times she's barked on one hand. The dog just does not bark. Ever. We kennel her when people come to work on our house, and they are always shocked to learn we have a dog. Doorbell rings? No bark. Stranger in the house? No bark. Needs to go out to potty? No bark. Tonight she barked! Lots of deep bellowing barks! Why? Well, because she's got priorities! She spotted an empty container of chocolate chip cookies in the garbage, so she barked to let us know she wanted some. Poor pup, maybe she'll bark before the container is empty the next time.

As a puppy

With "Ball Ball." Ball Ball goes everywhere with her!

With her favorite 4 year old :)

Extra Curious

I was really curious about how Linus would handle trick-or-treating this year. Remember last year?

She was really excited to dress like Minnie Mouse this year.

She was a little worried, but she did ring our neighbors' doorbells herself.

And......

She didn't run this year!!! Yippee!

An Extra PSA

I've read a lot and heard a lot about adoptions lately. I wanted to take the time to clear up some misconceptions. I know that for the most part these misconceptions are completely innocent, but to those involved, they are very real. I'm also fully aware that there are some naysayers out there, and nothing I (nor anybody else) say will change their minds.

*Birthmothers are NOT all strung out, drug abusing people. Many birthmothers are simply in a place in life that they are unable to care for their baby the way they want/think the child deserves, so by placing the baby in another home, they are actually giving that baby all they could not.

*Birthmothers are NOT all teenagers. Many are in their 20s and 30s. Some are in their 40s.

*Teenage birthmothers are NOT selfish. Placing a baby is often a very hard and heart-wrenching decision. Teen (and other age) birthmothers are not always placing their baby out of convenience. They are placing out of love.

*Birthmothers do NOT give up their babies, they place them in loving homes.

*Open adoption is not a bad thing. There are tremendous benefits to everyone involved in open adoptions. Some people who benefit are birth families (mother, father, grandparents, etc), adopted child, and adoptive families (mother, father, grandparents, etc).

*Birthmothers are NOT always alone. Many times the birthfather and/or birth grandparent(s) are also involved.

*Being adopted does not define who a child is, it's simply part of their story.

*Yes, matches (when a birthmother has chosen a family but the baby has not been born yet) do fail on occasion, and yes, reclaims (when the birthmother decides to parent) do happen, but not all domestic adoptions are doomed to fail.

*No, with the laws today, if followed precisely, reclaim lawsuits are not with tons of merit. There are processes to go through with tribal relinquishments as well as birthfather and birthmother relinquishments. Yes, these do happen, but as long as laws are followed, this is rare. That's what adoption attorneys are for.

*Yes, there are people who are involved with emotional scams. Reputable adoption agencies are able to recognize *most* of them. Unfortunately, there is still heartbreak involved.

_______

What to say/not to say to a waiting family:

*Not a good idea: "Do you have a baby yet?" Better: "We're thinking about you and keeping you in mind if we hear of somebody wanting to place."

*Not a good idea: "How could a mother give up her child? I could never do it." Better: "What a difficult time this must be for the birthmother. I'll keep her in my thoughts."

________

Thoughts to keep to yourself:

*Not a good idea: "I could never adopt. I don't want to raise somebody else's child." Many thanks, she IS my child.

*Not a good idea: "I couldn't adopt. I just couldn't handle the fear of losing the child." Isn't losing a child ANY parent's WORST nightmare? I'm not afraid of "losing" Linus to her birthmother, but my biggest fear is losing her to any other possibility: cancer, car accident, etc.

Not a good idea: "All adopted children have emotional problems." Really? Name one of Linus's problems.

_______

One last thought:
I know many people fear that the adopted child will eventually want to meet his/her birth family. Truthfully, I think many first time adoptive families have that fear in the beginning. It subsides relatively quickly for most though. I actually LOVE Linus's birthmom. I make sure Linus knows I love her birthmom. I want her to know it's ok with me if she wants to meet her. Many adopted children fear hurting the parents who raised them if they choose to meet the birth family. I don't want that fear to keep Linus from doing something she wants to do. Her birthmom and birth grandmom are FABULOUS people. If she wants to meet them, I'd fully support her. I feel it's her decision to make, though, not mine. I also make sure Linus knows her birthmom's decision to place was guided by her love for Linus. She wanted Linus to have everything she wasn't able to give her at that point in her life. Linus knows her birth story. We keep nothing from her, nor do we plan to. She happily tells people she grew in my heart. And, my goodness, is she right---my heart swells daily with love for her! :)

If you have anything to add or any questions, please let me know! :)

ETA: Please be sure to look at Jamielee's comment in the comment section. She has a great point.

Extra Word Play

For years now I've told Linus it is time for "Beddy Bye." Last night she was getting her Bitty Baby doll, Caroline, ready for bed. She gently dressed Caroline in her pajamas, cradled her head, and rocked her. Then she started walking towards her room and said, "Come on Caroline, it's time for Bitty Bye." :)
____________

The other day Linus and I were about to head out for some errands. I said, "Why don't you wear __________ (I can't even remember what I suggested)?" She told me, "I'd rather wear my pretty pink princess Happy Birthday shirt."

Your what???

My pretty pink princess Happy Birthday shirt!

Linus, you don't have a pretty pink princess Happy Birthday shirt.

She got a little grin and said, "Well, I guess I really need to get one then!"

An Extra Dose of Linus

Last year Linus and I were in Walgreens. They had their Halloween display out, and it included Winnie the Pooh and Tigger inflatables dressed in Halloween costumes. Linus (then 3!) totally out-witted me. Here's our conversation as we walked in:

L: Mommy, who is that?

M (slightly confused because I knew she knew who it was): Pooh

L: And who is that?

M (more confused because I really knew she knew who it was): Tigger

L: Oh. Do you know what Tigger says to Pooh at Halloween?

M: No, what?

L: TIGGER TREAT! (Get it? Tigger treat---> Trick-or-Treat)

The people who were near us cracked up, which just fueled Linus on. The WHOLE time we were at the store, and for days afterward, all we heard was "Tigger Treat!"

One of my friends loved it so much that she loaned us a Tigger costume. Poor Linus, she put it on, but it freaked her out.

Then I offered a bribe to get her to smile. It worked!

Then she got to change. She decided to be a ballerina. We took her trick-or-treating. Unfortunately, she didn't get the concept of staying at the door after she rang the doorbell. Oops!

I'll let you know how this year goes. :)

Extra Busy

I've been extra busy, but in a very good way. I've spent the last few weeks buried under loads of adoption work. We're finally at the point where we can see the light, but all that really means is we're at a point where we wait for a birthmother to choose us. Linus's birthmom is the most amazing person. I truly hope we are blessed with somebody as fabulous as she is.

:)

Extra Bible Lesson

Q: How do you know you eat out too often?

A: When your 4 year old tells you, "It's just like in the Bible in the Book of Papa John..."

Extra Funny! :)

Want to see something funny?

(click to make it larger and be sure to look at the horse's mouth!)
X


When I said, "Smile!" I meant for Linus to smile, not the horse!

Extra Late

***Originally (as in DAYS ago) I was posting pics with this, but since the photo aspect of it is giving me fits, it's just text for now. Pics to follow in the next day or two, I hope!***

Sorry about the delay, I've been sick.



Kim was right, we went to Disney. Yummy treat on the way, Kim.



Favorite thing Linus said at DW (as Alice in Wonderland went by at the parade & with a look of total amazement):

Wow! This place really IS a wonderland!



Favorite rides:

Linus--ALL of them. I made her narrow it down, and this is what I got: magic carpet ride, Thunder Mountain, Goofy's Roller coaster, Peter Pan, It's a Small World, carousel, Test Track, and Pirates of the Caribbean.

Mine: Thunder Mountain and Pirates of the Caribbean (same as always!)

Army: liked all of them except Thunder Mountain



Least Favorite Ride:

All of us: Dinosaur (I think that's what it's called). It's at Animal Kingdom, and you go on a jeep-ish ride. We all HATED it!

Extra Busy!

I've been busy, busy, busy trying to catch up on laundry, work my volunteer hours, work on adoption stuff (no, no news yet), and keep my family fed. I'm going to leave you with some valuable princess information just in case you visit Disney anytime soon.

I'm sure other children have said this in the past, but Linus never really did, so we got a HUGE laugh out of it when my niece (2.5) said it...

Big A has a placemat with all the Disney princesses on it. She was naming the ones she knew for my sister. "This is Cinderwewa, this is Snow White, and this is Sleeping Booty. Oops! No saying booty. Sorry Mommy! This is Sleeping Hiney." :) When my sis called our mom later that evening, Big A told my mom that she has a placemat with Sleepy Hiney on it!

Extra Lazy

I'm still exhausted from our trip, returning to out-of-town company at our house, and taking Linus to a birthday party tonight, so I'm taking the lazy way out for now...

Guess where we went. Yummy prize to the first person to get it right.

~It was HOT!
~We were attacked by swarms of love bugs.
~We ate, and ate, and ate.
~Linus begged to live there. She told us our house was too old (it's only 3 1/2 years old!).

If nobody guesses correctly, I'll give easier hints.

An Extra Short Note

Hi All,

We just returned from a nice vacation. I didn't mean to skip out for so long...I got sick before we left, then I thought I'd have internet connection at the resort. I'm exhausted, but I'll be back tomorrow (Saturday) with tons of Linus stories, maybe some pics (depends on how much I get accomplished by then), and some tidbits about our vacation. I hope everyone is well! :)

Extra Cuteness

Poor Linus! As I suspected, she is sick. She still managed to say some cute and funny things today though.

This morning she asked me if she could ask Santa for a princess bra. I told her I didn't think so. When she asked why not, I thought I'd be clever and take the you don't need one approach, so I told her that she didn't need one yet. She asked if she could ask Santa for one when she got older. I told her I guessed so, but just because she asks doesn't mean he will bring it even when she is older. That seemed to satifsy her, which satisfied me. A few minutes later though, she hit me with, "Mommy, can I ask Santa for boobies for Christmas?" ACK!

By late afternoon, Army has a noticible 5 o'clock shadow every evening. Tonight at dinner, Linus looked over at him. Looking wasn't enough, so she got up and rubbed the stubble on his chin. Then she said the cutest thing. She said, "Daddy, you have beard seeds to grow a beard like Condad (my dad who has a beard right now)." Isn't that adorable?

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to edit a certain four year old's Christmas Wish List!!!

An Extra Invitation

First, many thanks for your well wishes for Linus! We are very thankful that she had a mild case! Thanks for the wonderful ideas too!
----------
Army spent the weekend with a wicked virus. He still isn't doing great. I love my family dearly, but I can only spend time inside the house for so long without going a little nuts. I was really looking forward to getting out today. Linus and I did get out (we've been given the ok), but not long after we got home I heard 6 little words that set my Mommy Alarm off. These are words every mother should want to hear, but they definitely invoke fear in me. After we had been home for about an hour, Linus said, "Mommy, can I take a nap?" I knew in an instant she was sick. Those words just don't cross the lips of my child. She has never been one to sleep anywhere but her bed or her carseat. When she does (I can count the times she's done it on one hand, even as a baby), she's sick. No exception. So, now she's sound asleep in my bed. I've tried to wake her, but she's not interested in getting up. Poor baby. I'm hoping it's just allergies or a simple cold! Time will tell, but I guarantee she's sick, not just tired.

So, who wants to come over and visit?

Oh come on, nobody?

Really? You don't want to come visit my chicken pox, wicked virus, and still-to-be-determined-illness germ infested home?

Gosh, y'all are no fun!

Extra Bumps

Linus has chicken pox! I guess that vaccine wasn't a 100% guarantee. :(

She's handling it like a champ. She's one amazing child!

A Little Extra Evening with Linus

We went out to dinner tonight (I know, big surprise). Linus LOVES blue jello, which she calls blue bumpies. After finishing her potatoes and fish, she asked if she could have her blue bumpies. I told her she had to have 4 bites of carrots first. She looked at Army and me and said, "Shh, did y'all hear that?" We both fell for it and said no. "Shhh, listen, my teeth just said they would rather bumpies!" Nice try!

On the way home, we stopped at the video store to rent a movie. I think we are the last people on the face of the earth who don't have Netflix or Blockbuster through the mail. We don't have Tivo either. When Army was about to go in, he asked what I wanted if they didn't have the movie we were looking for. I don't know if I've ever mentioned it (haha!) but I love mini Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. I'm thinking about leaving Army for the man in charge of the MRPBC factory. Naturally, I told him that if they didn't have the movie we wanted, my next choice was fresh MRPBC. There is a grocery store in the same complex as the movie rental store. He didn't think my idea was all that funny. While he was in the store looking for the movie, I prepped Linus to ask for "fresh snacks" when he returned since I know he'll do anything for her (yes, I know I'm evil). She started asking the minute he go to the car. He looked at me and said, "Well played!" then drove over to the grocery store (it was raining, we're not that lazy). Right before he got out, Linus asked, "Mommy, what should I ask Daddy for next?" Thankfully he laughed, but I'm fully aware--and scared--of the monster I created.

As we pulled into the driveway tonight, she looked up at the sky and said, "When I go to outer space..." I immediately said, "I'll be so sad when you go. I'll miss you." My little sweetie said, "Don't be scared, Mommy, Daddy will take good care of you, and I'll have my eye on you the whole time from outer space!"

Extra Vocabulary Part II

What are the chances???

Tonight Army and I went out to dinner, and Linus stayed behind with a babysitter. Her babysitter and I are friends, and she is a teacher at the preschool Linus attends. I told her the story about Linus and the word.

When Army and I got home, the babysitter gushed about how good Linus was. I praised Linus and told her how proud of her I was. Then it happened. She decided to sit down in the grass, and the babysitter said, "Oh, be careful, that's probably damp."

Damn?

No, damP!

Oooh. Damn!

NO! DamPPPPP.

Ok, Ok, I won't sit in the damn grass.

Thanks teach! Now I can blame you if she says it at school!

Extra Vocabulary

My sister called Saturday night to tell me what her oldest daughter (2.5) said. My sister and her husband are good, as opposed to Army and me who have been known to let a word fly every now and then. We truly try to watch our language, but when you drop an entire bottle of liquid medicine on the floor, and the sticky mess immediately takes up home in the spaces between the wood planks in your floor, well "damn!" just may slip out. My sis and her hubby are better at being cautious, or so I though. When she called, she said, "I know you think we're saints, but you won't believe what Big A said. She's said it a few times throughout the day, but it wasn't until a second ago that it was quite obvious that she was saying, 'Oh man! Damn it!" I laughed hysterically. The thought of her daughter doing it was hilarious especially since my daughter hasn't exactly said it yet. Linus slipped one a year ago or so, but she said "Minute" instead. We're such bad parents that our dog's full name involves the word minute. I know, go ahead and nominate us for parent of the year! Anyway, I've giggled to myself a few times since my conversation with my sister.


Then it happened.

This morning, Linus ripped a big "damn it" because she couldn't have what she wanted for breakfast.


Shhhh. Don't tell my sister. I sure haven't!

Extra Smiles

Linus started her first day of 4 year old preschool Tuesday. I take a picture in the same place every year so that I can see her growth. If you look at the door knob, window, and lock, you'll really see her getting taller. I started around the time school starts when she was itty bitty so that they'd always correspond to the first day of school.

First day of 4 year old preschool. Her baby features have all but disappeared.


Her first day of 3 year old Mom's Morning Out


2 1/2 years old


18 months old

An Extra Dose of Religion ('Cause We Need It!)

We're Catholic, but it seems as though Linus is trying to get us excommunicated. Don't believe me? I've got proof:

1) A friend gave Linus a Rosary when she was two or so. Linus LOVES it, and she wears it often. She finally calls it by its proper name most of the time. In the beginning though, she called it "Jesus on a leash." I'm fairly certain the Pope wouldn't be amused!

2) For at least a year, Linus called the steeple on a Presbyterian church near us a "witch tower." It had nothing to do with it not being a Catholic church, she was simply convinced that it truly was a witch tower.

3) She overheard an adult at preschool say, "Oh my God" one day, so now she says it. Hers is very deliberate though...more like Oh. My. God. We do correct her!

4) She truly believes the words to the chorus of The First Noel are "Oh well, oh well, oh well, oh well..." instead of "Noel, Noel..." Worse yet, none of my family can hear that song now without giggling.


She does provide some saving grace though. I'm pretty certain that's why they haven't kicked us out yet:

A) Remember what she calls a church playground?

B) Remember how we'll add to our family? You have to scroll down on this one to the last paragraph for the adding to our family part.

C) Remember her thoughts on Mufassa's death?

D) She truly loves going to chapel at her preschool and relates the stories she hears there to things that occur in our everyday lives.

Hopefully the good outweighs the bad and they'll let us continue to be members.

Extra Credit

Extra credit if you can identify the picture below. Linus called me to her room the other night to see what she had drawn (this was after she was already in bed for the night, little stinker).



Here's what I saw:





So what is it?






Oh come on, make a guess.





Nope! Try again.




Give up?





Isn't it obvious? It's vines for Tarzan to swing on!

Extra Foot? Insert in Mouth

I was talking with friends recently about foot-in-mouth situations. I have two distinct ones, though I'm pretty certain I have others that I'm choosing to forget. Believe it or not, neither of these two were part of my most embarrassing moments list from a week or so ago.

The first time I remember inserting my foot in my mouth was in high school. I was taking to a guy I had a crush on. I knew he had a really cool car, I had seen it! We were standing on a balcony one morning before school watching cars go by. As one car pulled in, I commented that I hated that type of car, and I could never date somebody who drove one. Yes, I know that was shallow, but I was in high school. I looked back at him, and I knew immediately I had said the wrong thing. Did I just shut up? Oh, but no. I looked at him and said, "Oh come on, I've seen your car. I know you don't drive one of those. They are the ugliest things I've ever seen, and I know you wouldn't buy one." He looked at me and said, "Nope, you're right. I wouldn't buy one." I wondered why he stressed the word buy, but I still didn't get it. In fact, I didn't get it until he walked away and another friend walked up to me and asked what the heck I had just said (she saw his face before he walked off). I told her, and she immediately let me know what an idiot I was. Nope, he wouldn't buy one because he already had one. Ugh! He usually drove his "cool" car to school, but he had his deceased grandfather's old car too. The same car I had just belittled. I felt SO bad. He's a really good guy though. To this day, he still gives me a huge hug every time I see him. In fact, in a round about way, he's partly responsible for my engagement ring. :)

My other time was recently. Linus was really the one that did the foot sticking, but it was my fault. Her whole life, I've been telling her "no touching" when we go to public restrooms. We've walked into more than one stall and turned around and walked out because the seat was filthy. We went to visit one of my good friends from college recently. Linus really had to go to the potty, but the only potty that wasn't occupied in her house was in the master bedroom. She walked us back there, and was still in there as Linus took a look at the seat, panicked and announced that she could not use such a dirty potty. It wasn't dirty at all, but the paint was chipped on the seat. Thankfully she has three children and was completely used to kids saying things like that. I felt so badly though!

Extra Trouble

I'm in trouble. Big trouble.

Remember we're the freaks that only eat dessert on Tuesdays and Saturdays? Yeah, well there's a reason we do that. Although there's a *slight* possibility that I *may* be a *little* bit of a control freak, I have absolutely no control with food. I have even less control with desserts. Portion control? What's that? It sure doesn't help that I love to bake. By limiting the availability of sweets in the house, I am able to keep my dessert eating obsession in check.

Army and I threw caution to the wind for most of the summer and ignored, errr forgot, our Tuesday/Saturday rule. I've got a few (possibly more) unwanted pounds to lose as a result. We've been quite strict about it lately though.

Some of you may remember that my dad had a TBI (traumatic brain injury) this Spring. Mom and Dad came up Friday. During their drive up, Mom received a call on her cell with some results from some tests my father took earlier in the week. The results were outstanding! :) I look for any excuse to skip cooking, so his results absolutely meant we had to go out to dinner to celebrate. The restaurant we were going to was crowded, so we went with a one that wasn't exactly somewhere to celebrate. I got the bright idea to take him to a local bakery and let him pick out a treat today (Saturday, so it falls within our dessert night rule) since Friday night's dinner wasn't what we had planned. We got there, and he decided he didn't want to go in, so he sent Army and me in to pick something out.

BIG mistake!

I have a slight obsession with petit fours. McKenzie's in New Orleans is 100% to blame. They made the most fabulous petit fours around. Ever. When I was pregnant (obviously not with Linus), petit fours were my one and only craving. It was one intense craving though. McKenzie's had closed a year (maybe 2?) before, but I fully intended to get in my car and drive SIX hours for a petit four. Where I'd get it was beyond me since McKenzie's didn't exactly exist anymore, but I was going to figure out those details later. No joke. I think it was the tears that I shed over not being able to tame my craving that led Army to a local grocery store for petit fours. Poor guy brought home a zillion. I took one bite, announced I hated them, and that was that. Every now and then I'd dream about my beloved petit fours, but since I had tried an impostor and didn't like it, I wasn't about to try any others...

Until one day Army came home from work and told me he had McKenzie's caliber petit fours.

I was on a mission then, and had to have one. One? Eh, maybe SIX. I got in my car and drove over to a local bakery and ordered half a dozen. The lady behind the counter went to the petit fours, came back, and said, "I'm sorry ma'am, we only have six." Trying not to laugh, I smiled and simply said, "Oh, that's ok. Six will do just fine." To her credit, when she came back to ring up my order, she looked at me and said, "You must think I'm the biggest idiot ever. You said half a dozen, didn't you?" I just smiled and said, "I've had days like that too." Those petit fours were divine though. They made my taste buds dance the entire Nutcracker Suite. Those delicious little things have made me go to great lengths to avoid this bakery. If I went near it, my car would go on auto pilot and I'd end up at the bakery ordering a few. I simply had to make the bakery off limits unless it was a very special occasion.

Anyway, that's the bakery (though a different location) that we went to tonight. I fully intended to buy my father a slice of strawberry cake (his favorite), but I must admit I noticed immediately that their petit fours weren't where they usually are. Panic. I could feel my breathing become more rapid. It's a sick obsession, I tell ya. The guy in front of us asked for strawberry cake too, but they were out. Plan B. We then looked at the boxed baked goods and noticed a sign, "BUY ONE GET ONE FREE." YIPPEE!!!! Free petit fours, now all I had to do was find them. Then Army said, "Hey, Lanny, look! The one has been scratched out and now it says BUY ONE GET TWO FREE!" Hello? Heaven? Thank you!!! Army found something else he wanted though, so he grabbed that. There's no way I'm going there and leaving without petit fours, so we got those too.

Out we walked with three bags of M&M blondies and three boxes of petit fours.

There was no good reason at all that we should have bought that much. Here's the problem: we still have a ton and it's all I can think about. I'm practically drooling just typing about them. Good fresh petit fours even trump mini Reese's Peanut Butter Cups most days. Does that tell you how much I love these things?

I'm in trouble. Big trouble.

You might as well buy me a Santa suit now. I'll be fitting in it by Christmas. No extra padding will be needed.

An Extra Lesson in Numbers

Conversation at a restaurant today:

Linus (to the lady behind the counter): Hi, I'm four!

Lady: Really? You're four? Wow! I have a three year old little girl at home.

Linus: Yeah, I was three last year.

Lady (laughing): Really?

Linus: Yeah, but don't worry, she'll be a big girl on her next birthday.

Extra Scary!

Check your feet. Are they cold? Hell has nearly frozen over!

How do I know? Well, two extremely unlikely events have taken place recently leading me to believe it's getting mighty cold down there.

The first one isn't that huge, but it is extremely unlikely. For years and years I have been a t-shirt kind of girl at bedtime. I have lots of nightshirts that are long enough to cover everything that needs to be covered and then some. I DO NOT sway from this. Ever. Army even buys me soft nightshirts for gifts sometimes, and I love getting them! I have enough to stuff and entire drawer full. And I do mean stuff! I do keep shorts/sweats/pj bottoms by the bed in case Linus needs me in the middle of the night, and I do put them on first thing in the morning if I don't hop straight in the shower, but I do not wear them in bed. Ever. I cannot stand the feeling of something on my legs at night. I can't even stand a long nightgown because it bothers me when I roll over. You get the point--t-shirts only.

Last night we had the most wicked thunder. It was rolling thunder that would go on and on and on. Then as soon as one would finally end another would start. Then the rain started. I'm not sure I've ever heard rain that heavy. As I got ready for bed, I glanced at our weather radio (tornadoes are common here, so we keep one by the bed), but there were no warnings. Our subdivision is too new for cable--something about they won't run lines until the entire subdivision is complete--so we have satellite. If there are clouds in the sky, there is no satellite on the tv. Unless we're in the midst of a tropical storm, then we have it. Go figure. I wasn't that worried, until Army said something to me that got me a little concerned. Then I laughed and asked him if it could really happen, and he let me know that he wasn't kidding. Now I was starting to worry. Then we started getting the kind of thunder that shakes the chandelier. Army asked me if I heard a train in the background. He was kidding, but it hit my last nerve. I started to imagine what would happen if a tornado hit, or if our house was struck by lightening. Would you believe it freaked me out enough that I got up and put on a full pair of pajamas? As in top AND bottom. I didn't just put the bottoms by my bed, I put them ON. I had a horrible time sleeping last night, not because of the weather, but because of the bottoms. I did make it the whole night with them though. This morning, Army asked me if hell had frozen over. Yep, it was getting there.

This is far more compelling evidence though. The night I had my migraine, I rode with Army and Linus to pick up some dinner. Sometimes riding in the car with the air conditioner blowing directly in my face helps. Apparently it helps my head, but not my sanity. We're big Johnette Downing fans, so we usually have one of her cd's playing while Linus is in the car. Army left the radio on though while he ran into the restaurant. A song came on, and I changed it, but Linus begged to listed to what she called the tapping song. I changed a few more channels, but I couldn't find anything she liked. My head hurt too badly to even comprehend which channel was the kids channel, and it apparently hurt too badly to just let one of her cd's play. I ended up putting it back on the tapping song on the original station. I canNOT believe I let my child listen to Michael Jackson's Billie Jean!!!

Wait, it gets worse.

When Army got in the car, a new song was on. I told him what I had done, and he was shocked. He even mentioned that my migraine must have been really bad for me to let my four year old listen to Michael Jackson. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore reality as best I could. Then all of a sudden it hit me. MADONNA's Material Girl was on the radio, and he didn't change it.

What kind of parents are we? Wait. Don't answer that!

An Extra Huh?

I had a horrible migraine yesterday. Nothing I took made a difference. Last night while we ate dinner, Linus was attempting to tell me about her day. Thankfully her daddy was off, so he was able to entertain her most of the day while I took just about every legal drug imaginable. Apparently she watched a series of Scholastic videos we have. They are videos of well known children's books. She told me "Daddy and I watched movies upstairs. We watched Where the Wild Things Are, Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, but I can't recall the other one." WHAT??? Exactly how old are you Linus, Seventy? I looked at Army and asked him if I was hearing things or if she just said that. He laughed. Sure enough she said it. My four year old talks like somebody eligible for Medicare.

Later that evening, Army felt sorry for me, so he picked up some mini Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. I was finally feeling like I could possibly eat, so I ate a few. There were many left over this morning. Linus has the same love for mrpbc that I have. Love? Obsession? I'm not quite sure which is more accurate. All I know is they send me to my happy place! Anyway, when Linus noticed them this morning, she ran to the bag. I held her off until after lunch when I noticed her little hand stuffed in the bag. When she pulled it out, she must have had at least five. My hand can barely hold five, no idea how hers can. I guess it's just the power of mrpbc. She unwrapped one and stuck it in her mouth. Then the little booger walked over to my computer and put the wrapper down as she said, "I'm just going to put this over here by your computer. That way it'll look like you ate it and Daddy will let me have more tonight." I asked her if she thought that was wrong since it wasn't exactly telling the truth. She told me that no, it wasn't wrong, it was just smart!

Then I curled up in a fetal position because I know I'm in big trouble when the teenage years hit!

An Extra Peek at Cuteness

Want to see the face behind all the chaos at my house?

I found this pic while I was loading some pics to a cd. I set up a backdrop to take a few shots of Linus last summer. This shot, believe it or not, was not posed. Linus kept grabbing toys to play with while I tried to get her to pose for shots. I finally gave in and told her she could play with one toy for five minutes. She eyed the toys as she tried to figure out which to play with. I snapped this while she was eyeing them. Ignore the backdrop, I still need to make it true black.

It is the essence of Linus!

An Extra Conversation or Two

Linus has been on a roll today. It all started in the grocery store parking lot. she spotted a man that looked just like my uncle. "Hey, that looks just like my granuncle!" (Grand uncle) She usually calls him Uncle Pop, so I'm not quite sure where that came from.
-----
This afternoon it was raining very hard. Linus wanted to go out to get something to eat. She had eaten her way through the day, so I told her no, and I let her know I didn't really want to go out in this weather. She ran and got a Pizza Hut coupon card, tore one off, and said, "Now you don't have to go out!" It didn't work. I didn't order a pizza.
-----
"Mommy, can I have a baby stunk?"

"A what?"

"A stunk."

"Do you mean a skunk?"

"No, I mean a stunk. You know, those black animals with a white stripe that stink when they grow up."

"Linus, that's called a skunk."

"No, Mommy, they are stunks. Why would they call it a skunk? That's just silly. They are called stunks because they stink."
-----
Linus was being naughty and playing in the bathroom. Army told her to stop, but she kept playing. Then she reached her hand down towards the potty. Army raised his voice and told her not to do it. She looked up at Army and said, "Do not talk to my mommy's daughter that way!" Normally she would have gotten in trouble for talking like that, but we were laughing too hard.

A Little Extra Embarrassment

***WARNING: THE FOLLOWING POST MAY BE OFFENSIVE***

After I posted the poll earlier letting y'all decide what you wanted to read, I panicked and thought to myself, "Oh PLEASE don't let them pick #1" because I'm almost too embarrassed to post it. Not just because it was embarrassing, but because the word involved is just absolutely gross. My family would be so ashamed! It's a good thing they don't know about this blog, and if they ever find out I'll have to be sure to delete this post. Before I start, I do want to add the my friend's grandfather was an incredible man. He was kind and giving. He was a respected business man where he lived.

***ONE LAST WARNING*** Don't say I didn't warn you!

I was an incredibly naive child. Oh don't get me wrong, I wasn't an angel, but I was naive. I was especially naive when it came to slang terms. When Army and I met, he was shocked at how little slang I knew. A guy said something about "choking the chicken" at a party once, and I naively asked, "What chicken? Why would you do that?" Army nearly died. It became a joke about how naive I was. The guys went back and forth between wanting to expand my knowledge, and feeling horribly guilty for corrupting me.

Anyway, this incident happened the first semester of my freshman year. I already had a reputation for my innocence (haha, that almost makes me sound like I was an angel. Fear not, I could drink with the best of them). I went to my friend's grandparents' house for dinner one evening. After dinner, her grandmother pulled out some strawberries from the fridge. My friend and I dug in to the fresh strawberries, but her grandfather asked for a specific topping using a term I hadn't heard. As soon as her grandmother brought out the whipped cream, I knew what her grandfather's word meant. Ah, I knew using context clues would come in handy some day.

About a week later, we were eating dinner in the school cafeteria. I went to a rather small college, but we did have fraternities. They were all on campus. My friend and I were eating at a frat table (It was about 5 tables long) and the table was full. My friend said she was going to go see if there were any fresh desserts. I told her I was stuffed, I'd remain at the table. I was deep in a conversation with a major crush. No way in hell was I getting up and risking another girl stepping in! Oh how I wish now I had just gotten up.

My friend called to me by name (so everybody in the cafeteria knew who she was talking to!) and told me that they had fresh strawberries. Now, you'd think that I would know better than to use a word that I didn't really know what it meant, but since her grandfather had used it, I knew I was safe. What did my I say when she said, "Hey, Lanny, they have fresh strawberries. You want some?" I stood up and said rather loudly, "That depends. Do they have jism to go on them?"

---SILENCE!---

Oh. My. Goodness. You could hear she swooshing as heads turned to see what pervert just said that. The guy I *had* been talking to was laughing so hard as he sunk under the table. After what felt like hours, one of the guys at my table choked out through his laughter, "It's ok, y'all! It was just Lanny that said that!" The room erupted in a mixture of laughter (guys) and horror (girls). I still had NO idea what I had said wrong. When I asked one of the guys, he said he'd tell me, but that I'd probably rather not know. One of them finally told me, and I was so embarrassed! The major hottie I had been talking to said the sweetest thing. He said that the guys all new I had no idea what it meant, and obviously the girls who were horrified DID know, which made them worse.

That event was a standing joke for years! YEARS! Army still thinks it is hilarious. If Linus isn't around, he'll still ask for whipped cream by another name (ahem) just to embarrass me. I'm still not sure which is worse though--the embarrassment of saying it or just the grossness of the word. To this day, I think it's one of the most disgusting words in the English language.

So, now that you've read it, YOU are tagged. I'll come looking at some of your blogs for your most embarrassing moments!

An Extra Voting Opportunity

I was tagged by a friend. It was her creative way of trying to get me to write my own blog. Only one person knows about my blog IRL, so I can't link her back, or she'd know and spread it. I'll eventually let others know about my blog, but for now, I'm enjoying my IRL friends not knowing.

Her tag was to blog your most embarrassing moment. I actually have three that completely embarrass me, but keep my friends laughing hysterically (and teasing me about the events!). So, I'm letting you vote on which one you want to hear. Poll is on the upper right side. Below gives a brief idea of each one to help you vote.

#1--Happened my freshman year of college and involves the use of the WRONG (very wrong!) word! It may be offensive to some, so keep that in mind when voting.

#2--Happened in college at a frat house. Thank goodness most people were drunk. Again, this was college, and it may be offensive to some, though not terribly.

#3--Happened a few years ago and involves an obygn-ish visit. A man reading this would be squeamish, but I don't think it would be offensive, just embarrassing.

So, vote now. I'll check the votes tonight around 11 and my most embarrassing moment will be up shortly after. Or maybe not. Just kidding, I'll do it.

A Little Extra Love

My grandmother passed away 10 years ago today. I usually don't dwell on dates of death, but knowing the exact date of death for my grandparents is rather easy: three of the four passed away on the 23rd of the month.

My Memere was an incredible lady. I miss her dearly, as do her other grandchildren. I grew up in a very close knit family. We had dinner probably three to four nights a week at my grandparents' house. The table was full of cousins, aunts, and uncles. She knew our favorite meals, and she rotated them.

I wish Linus had a chance to meet her. Linus would have loved her soft yet spunky demeanor. Memere wasn't afraid to play, even though she had on heels and hose. She lived life, she didn't just go through the motions.

Man, ten years seem like such a long time, yet I can still feel her hugs and smell her like it I saw her yesterday. I can easily picture her soft creamy skin. If only I could really put my arms around her. I can honestly say though, I knew (so did my sister and cousins) what a good person I had in my life. I'm so thankful I was able to see that while she was here, rather than only after she was gone.

------

Is anybody else having trouble leaving comments? I've tried to comment on several blogs for the past day or two, but I keep getting a security message that never ends. I click out of it, then it pops back up. I end up having to get off the internet completely to stop it. Of course, now that I've asked this, I'm realizing that if you're having that trouble too, you won't be able to leave a comment to tell me. Ugh! Oddly enough, I can comment on my own blog.

An Extra Confession

I have a confession. Maybe just by admitting I did this, I'll be too embarrassed to ever do it again.

It's possible that I may have eaten close to a dozen cookies last night. They were good. Damn good. They had Reese's Pieces in them, and the taste of the brown sugar in them sent me into such a happy place that I didn't care how many fat grams were in each one. I love the taste of brown sugar in cookies. It makes a cookie perfect to me. These were perfect. They were the kind of fresh that begins to almost melt when it hits your tongue. Mmmm, I can taste that brown sugar melting now. If I was lucky enough to get one with Reese's Pieces showing at the bottom, I'd become over the top happy. When you get one with RP at the bottom, sugar has collected around the RP and you get that extra little burst of brown sugar.

Poor Linus. Army and I had a babysitter last night, so we went to a fabulous dinner. Then we made the date extra romantic and went grocery shopping. I know, such romance! Anyway, we only eat dessert on Tuesdays and Saturdays (or any special occasion we make up), but we were too full to even think about dessert at the restaurant. There was no way I was letting my dessert day pass me by though, so we decided to pick something up while we were at the store. We looked at small items, but were drawn to our delicious cookies. I could hear them calling me from a few aisles away. When we looked at the cookies, we decided there were way too many (20). The concept of something lasting days and days in our home hasn't quite made it to our lives yet, so we generally buy dessert in small amounts. We looked at smaller cookie containers (10), but those cookies were huge, so 10 huge cookies actually ended up being more cookie than 20 small ones. Army finally decided Linus was likely still awake, so she'd help us with them.

Now my confession gets worse: Linus was awake. We put her to bed before we opened the cookies. The two of us ate all the cookies by ourselves. All. The. Cookies! I really planned to eat only a few. Every now and then, I'd get up from my computer for some more water, and I'd meander over to the cookies and snatch one. Or two. After I'd finish, my tongue would get sad and long for the taste of it's dear friend Brown Sugar. I'd ignore it, but then it would pull the thirst act, and I'd have to get some more water. And eat a cookie. Or two. It was a vicious cycle until only one and a half cookies were left. Since I didn't want to be accused of being the pig who ate them all, I left those two for Army.

I got up this morning with a horrible stomach ache. Big surprise, I know. I didn't even get out of bed to tell Army goodbye. When I did finally haul my larger-than-last-night bum out of bed, I noticed there's still half a cookie left. So far, I'm resisting, but my horrible stomach ache might not be enough to help me resist all day. What about Linus? I offered it to her, but she said, "No thanks, I'm not in to sweets." Little turd!