Extra Trouble

I'm in trouble. Big trouble.

Remember we're the freaks that only eat dessert on Tuesdays and Saturdays? Yeah, well there's a reason we do that. Although there's a *slight* possibility that I *may* be a *little* bit of a control freak, I have absolutely no control with food. I have even less control with desserts. Portion control? What's that? It sure doesn't help that I love to bake. By limiting the availability of sweets in the house, I am able to keep my dessert eating obsession in check.

Army and I threw caution to the wind for most of the summer and ignored, errr forgot, our Tuesday/Saturday rule. I've got a few (possibly more) unwanted pounds to lose as a result. We've been quite strict about it lately though.

Some of you may remember that my dad had a TBI (traumatic brain injury) this Spring. Mom and Dad came up Friday. During their drive up, Mom received a call on her cell with some results from some tests my father took earlier in the week. The results were outstanding! :) I look for any excuse to skip cooking, so his results absolutely meant we had to go out to dinner to celebrate. The restaurant we were going to was crowded, so we went with a one that wasn't exactly somewhere to celebrate. I got the bright idea to take him to a local bakery and let him pick out a treat today (Saturday, so it falls within our dessert night rule) since Friday night's dinner wasn't what we had planned. We got there, and he decided he didn't want to go in, so he sent Army and me in to pick something out.

BIG mistake!

I have a slight obsession with petit fours. McKenzie's in New Orleans is 100% to blame. They made the most fabulous petit fours around. Ever. When I was pregnant (obviously not with Linus), petit fours were my one and only craving. It was one intense craving though. McKenzie's had closed a year (maybe 2?) before, but I fully intended to get in my car and drive SIX hours for a petit four. Where I'd get it was beyond me since McKenzie's didn't exactly exist anymore, but I was going to figure out those details later. No joke. I think it was the tears that I shed over not being able to tame my craving that led Army to a local grocery store for petit fours. Poor guy brought home a zillion. I took one bite, announced I hated them, and that was that. Every now and then I'd dream about my beloved petit fours, but since I had tried an impostor and didn't like it, I wasn't about to try any others...

Until one day Army came home from work and told me he had McKenzie's caliber petit fours.

I was on a mission then, and had to have one. One? Eh, maybe SIX. I got in my car and drove over to a local bakery and ordered half a dozen. The lady behind the counter went to the petit fours, came back, and said, "I'm sorry ma'am, we only have six." Trying not to laugh, I smiled and simply said, "Oh, that's ok. Six will do just fine." To her credit, when she came back to ring up my order, she looked at me and said, "You must think I'm the biggest idiot ever. You said half a dozen, didn't you?" I just smiled and said, "I've had days like that too." Those petit fours were divine though. They made my taste buds dance the entire Nutcracker Suite. Those delicious little things have made me go to great lengths to avoid this bakery. If I went near it, my car would go on auto pilot and I'd end up at the bakery ordering a few. I simply had to make the bakery off limits unless it was a very special occasion.

Anyway, that's the bakery (though a different location) that we went to tonight. I fully intended to buy my father a slice of strawberry cake (his favorite), but I must admit I noticed immediately that their petit fours weren't where they usually are. Panic. I could feel my breathing become more rapid. It's a sick obsession, I tell ya. The guy in front of us asked for strawberry cake too, but they were out. Plan B. We then looked at the boxed baked goods and noticed a sign, "BUY ONE GET ONE FREE." YIPPEE!!!! Free petit fours, now all I had to do was find them. Then Army said, "Hey, Lanny, look! The one has been scratched out and now it says BUY ONE GET TWO FREE!" Hello? Heaven? Thank you!!! Army found something else he wanted though, so he grabbed that. There's no way I'm going there and leaving without petit fours, so we got those too.

Out we walked with three bags of M&M blondies and three boxes of petit fours.

There was no good reason at all that we should have bought that much. Here's the problem: we still have a ton and it's all I can think about. I'm practically drooling just typing about them. Good fresh petit fours even trump mini Reese's Peanut Butter Cups most days. Does that tell you how much I love these things?

I'm in trouble. Big trouble.

You might as well buy me a Santa suit now. I'll be fitting in it by Christmas. No extra padding will be needed.