Friday, July 25, 2008

Extra Special

How do you say thanks?

A friend of mine did something so amazing for me yesterday. It caught me completely off guard.  I called Army to tell him about it, and he acknowledged how special it was with, "Oh Lanny, you didn't cry, did you?"  And truth be told, I was so touched that I did want to cry. I wanted to jump up and wrap my arms around her with the tightest hug and cry. 

I know none of this makes sense right now, but it will eventually.

I'm a bit worried now that I disappointed her with my lack of (public) emotion. Don't get me wrong, she didn't do it for attention; she did it as the most selfless act of love imaginable.  She did it because she knew how much it would mean to me (and my family), and eventually how much it will mean to somebody else.  She did it because she's a good person.  She did it because despite being considerably younger, she's far more mature than I am.  

She took time out of her day to do something for me. And like I said, I'm worried that I've now hurt her because my reaction wasn't as thankful as it should have been. Here's the thing though, I'm an ugly crier. A really ugly crier. And I've been a huge ball of emotions lately, so my intention may be to let a tear or two go, but instead the flood gates open. And that's exactly what happened...at home.  I tend to be an easily read book, and I tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve. I HATE that about myself.  I view it as a weakness.  I work really hard to hide my emotions in public. Unfortunately, the only time I tend to succeed is when it's least appropriate.  My fear of showing my emotions publicly has probably hurt her. I need to say I'm sorry, and I need to let her know how much I appreciate what she's done for me. I LOVE what she's done for me. I hold my gift in my hands and stare at it multiple times throughout the day.  Yet, I don't know how to thank her.  

 

8 comments:

kim-d said...

I need more info before I can help. I HATE it when you go all cryptic on me...BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Jeannie said...

Maybe just write her a note, and tell her that part about your fear of public emotions? Tell her how much it means to you?

If she is as wonderful as you say she is, then I am sure she will understand....

Daisy, Just Daisy said...

Hand-delivered flowers with a heart-felt note tucked in with them. (Hand-delivered by you of course.)

Anonymous said...

If it makes you feel better, you're not the only one. You did read my post about dropping Steve off on Thurs., right? I was dead serious. I think Frank can probably count the number of times he saw me cry on one hand. Nor do I jump up & down, screaming when I am happy. I am not terribly demonstrative. I'm at a point in my life where if people don't like it, oh well. Tough luck.

But if it really bothers you, you could just zip off a short note.

Overflowing Brain said...

Cookies. Cookies and a heart felt card expressing your thanks.

And more information please :)

Overflowing Brain said...

Oh and I am probably the ugliest cryer ever. I don't cry to get things because it actually makes everyone want to help me less.

KT said...

I think the best way to thank someone is to tell them honestly, straight from the heart, exactly how you feel. Just as you did here in your blog. You sound genuinely touched and appreciative. Tell her!

Anonymous said...

We sent two bouquets of flowers last week--one to a girlfriend to say thanks. So, flowers?