My parents came in town this weekend. It's always so nice to see them, and Linus LOVES them. We had a busy weekend. Busy, but great!
Would you believe Linus was really tame for her test? She did keep one lady in the waiting room quite entertained with her clever ways of asking to go home. She fussed just a tiny bit when they got ready to put the iv in, but she did very well after a second or two. I was rather crushed that they wouldn't let me stay with her while they sedated her, but since she didn't cry as they wheeled her off, I decided I better not either. ;) After the test was completed, they let us in the room rather quickly. Poor baby couldn't sit up by herself, and she was really slurring her words, but that's about all the entertainment she gave us. She did get a monstrous case of hiccups, which just made her appear even more drunk. They let us go rather quickly because of Army's medical background and the fact that she was just, well, boringly calm.
Then the fun began. She wanted to go up the stairs (skywalk is on the second floor), not the elevator. We dropped off her wagon and headed towards the stairs. As Army leaned down to pick her up, she protested, "Nnnnooooooo Daaaddddyyyy. I cannnnn doooooooo it myseffffth." Ah, here's what we were looking forward too, bad parents that we are, entertain us baby! We finally agreed that she could walk up the stairs, but only if she held my hand and Army held her from behind. What a sight we were. We made it upstairs and Army realized he didn't get the parking pass stamped. I attempted to corral her while he took off to get it stamped. The ladies at the info desk got quite a kick out of watching her try to walk. "Nnnoooooo, Moooommmyyy! I cannnnn---whoopsie! I cannnn waaaaalk! Whoopsie!" Army returned to, "There'sssssssss my Daddy!" with an attempt to run towards him. She missed and the window got a nice hug instead. Then we walked across they skywalk. About 1/2 way across, she announced, "I waaaannna sthkip." NOT a good idea to let a drunk 4 year old skip. We refused to let her try and held her hands firmly. She tried anyway with us walking at a regular pace and her skipping. Have you ever seen somebody who is loaded skip? Not pretty. Then she tried to sing. At the top of her lungs. Have I mentioned the echo in the skywalk? "Thwiiiinnnnkle, thwiiiinkle lithel ssttttaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." As we approached the elevator, she crouched down and made a grunting face. Army cupped his hands a few inches under her afraid she was about to potty. "No Linus. You're not in a bathroom! Are you ok? What's wrong?" She froze in this position for a few seconds. Army went into medical mode assessing whether she was having a reaction or seizure. I was laughing so hard that I was just working on attempting to breathe. I'm always way to dumb to realize how severe a situation we could be in. Ignorance is bliss sometimes. A few more seconds go by, and he's still attempting to cup his hands underneath her while asking her if she's ok and assessing her. All of a sudden she stands back up and says, "Thassss ruuuuuude Daaaddddyyyyyyy!" We made it to the car, and I picked her up to get her in her carseat. In the, oh say, half a second it took me to get her to her seat, she fell sound asleep. She was wide awake 2 minutes later. The only entertainment we got on the way home was her touching her eyebrows and pulling her hands away from her face like she was trying to move a stray hair. Over and over again. And again and again.
When we got home, she was relatively calm. She still had slightly slurred speech, and she couldn't walk a straight line, but it wasn't too bad. Since I have a sick sense of humor, I grabbed my camera and started recording the little booger trying to walk. Little stinker walked straight the entire time I had the camera. The only funny thing she did so was she walked up to the lens and hugged me and said, "I love you, Mommy!" It was very close up! We snuggled for about an hour, then she was 100% back to normal. Our friends told us how funny their child had been, and we had nothing to tell. Well, nothing unless you count when I talked her into nodding her head, opening her eyes wide, smiling, and saying, "One time at band camp." Army loved that. Yeah, we're sick, no good, rotten parents. But she loves us, I have proof on my camera! :)
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Ahhh, this is what I was waiting for! First, so glad you had a good time with your parents; nothing better than good times with family!
Well, apparently Linus's no good, rotten parents also attract no good, rotten blog friends because I was extremely entertained by her hilarious little post-sedation self! However, what I really think is that if this child's parents were really no good and rotten, there is no way she would be able to be as funny as she is. Every child should be so lucky as to have no good, rotten parents like you and your husband! :)
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