Yesterday morning a friend passed away very unexpectedly. To say it was shocking news is an understatement. She was just a tad bit older than me, active, and health conscious. She is the mother to two small children; one is Linus's age, the other is only two years older. How do these things happen? I just don't get it.
I'm really uncertain as to how to approach it with Linus. She still is grieving the loss of Pop. Her poor little mind is trying so hard to wrap itself around the concept of death, but it's more than she's ready for right now. I'm scared that when I add the death of my friend (who is also the mother of her friend and one of her MDO teachers), she'll translate that to my mortality.
Please pray/think good thoughts for my friend's family. They are a fabulous family. It's really hitting my group of friends hard too, though I know our pain pales in comparison.
9 comments:
I am so sorry for your loss, and my thoughts are with your friends family. (you mentioned she is still getting over Pop...is that your dad? I thought he was doing better, I am sorry if I missed sad news....)
My dear aunt passed away when the girls were 4 and Nate 1 1/2. It was very difficult for us to explain, as we had all of that grief, but they processed it. They were sad, of course, but it was their 1st exposure to death. And, yes,it did prompt near daily talks of my mortality or theirs-which made them very upset. (me, too,actually....I am terrified of death)
There are some good books out there, depending on your beliefs/views. Some are more religious, others more matter of fact.
You are in my thoughts....
Oh, Lanny, I'm so sorry. We had an unexpected death this weekend, too. You're never prepared. Especially when little ones are involved. Many, many prayers for your family and your friend's family. I pray that God will give you the words to talk with Linus and bring peace to all of your hearts.
Big hugs & good thoughts going your way.
First, I am very sorry for your loss. That is just horrible news.
Second, when my girls were around 2-3 and 4-5, we had many deaths in my family. My grandmother, my husband's uncle, his great uncle, his great aunt, our cat, our neighbor's dog, our neighbors mother, and finally my aunt. My kids did not know what was going on. There was sadness everywhere and they did not understand everything. I wish now that I'd gone and gotten a book to read to them about death.
They asked me so many questions about heaven, God, angels, ghosts. Just be honest and make it in terms your child can understand. Simple is best, but don't lie. I found that what worked as being as honest as I needed to be without giving so much info I overwhelmed them. It's hard, and it's so sad to see your child learn about this sadness, isn't it? Hang in there.
Oh Lanny, I am truly sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and prayers will be with her friends and family. How sad and confusing for her children, and for Linus. I wish I had some good advice for you but I'm waaay old and I still can't wrap my head around death. Be gentle and speak from your heart, she will know. Take care and know I am thinking of you.
Hugs to you Lanny, so sorry to read about the loss of your friends. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.
Hugs to you, Lanny. As Alice said, it is always sad but somehow worse when it is someone young or someone who has young children. We were at the funeral Monday of a 35 year old father of two children, ages 4 and 1. It was devastating.
One day the reasons will all be revealed to us.
Love to you,
Leeann
I'm so sorry. Death is a hard thing for adults to understand, but almost impossible to children.
I am so sorry. It is especially hard when death visits again so soon.
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