An Extra Dose of Drugs

I’m beginning to think Linus truly enjoys embarrassing me. At her Thanksgiving lunch at preschool, they were asked to tell what they were thankful for. Linus said, “I’m thankful for my mommy, daddy, puppy, and my new little brother.” Everybody’s head turned so quickly I swear there was a swooshing noise. Um, no. No news on my end. Linus is an only child. NO brothers, no sisters. No, I wasn’t pregnant. Just as everybody is turning back to listen to the next child, Linus pipes in with, “oh, and I’m thankful for my crack house that I live in.” I couldn’t help myself. I had to interrupt. “What Linus? What do you mean?” With slow and deliberate words, she answered, “I’m thankful for our crack house, Mommy. I’m glad we have a crack house to live in.” After a few back and forths about this, we finally established that we had a slight crack in our house near the front door, thus we had a crack house. Duh Mommy!

The other day we were playing and the phone rang. I answered it, and she continued to play in her kitchen. While I’m on the phone, Linus comes over to me and puts something on my head. Then she announces loudly enough for the person on the other end of the phone to hear, “My mommy is a pothead!” Yes, she had put a pot on my head, thus making me a pothead! Yeah, try explaining to somebody that has already heard that you live in a crack house that you really aren’t a pot head even though your 4 year old announces you are.

For the record, I am not a pot head and we do not live in a crack house! :) And, no, she does not hear the terms pothead and crack house on a regular basis. We've also since repaired the crack near our front door!